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Optimism is a lie

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...And I Saw you, and I knew that I was getting into trouble
You didn't seem like it. Do not get me wrong here. You were everything I thought I didn't want. You were everything I knew I didn't need--But then something happened. Something changed.
 Don't ask me. you won't be able to handle it. Why? I know not.
actually, It is pretty weird. I know nothing, and still, somehow I thought, I knew everything. Confusing enough? Let me simplify it for you.

 I won't be starting from Day 1, For, If I Could, I would. It is probably because-- Not the fact that I am embarrassed to write, But because, I do not remember when it all started. 
At first, I thought it was all fun and games,
Days with you were like walking in an endless field of beautiful orchids, You know, the ones that look super pleasant.
It reminded me of you, whenever I would come across a few- And now, I sleep at morning dew. Thinking of why, and how could you, Get through, So easily without me, beside you.

--weren't you accustomed, much?
Well, I don't mean to say things bad, for that's just not how I am,
Today, well, yes. I do write, after a while, and I am sad, I won't deny. But now that I write I write with joy, even with tears in my eye,
--those are not happy, neither am I,
but this post must be, although it is a lie.
So yes, I write this on a positive note, Even though I do not remember most of the things that happened, for real.
 But, I still want you to know, the way you made me Feel, was happy and gay, In the  nicest of way.

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